#like oof i love me some morally questionable characters

[buzzyb33]

Moral of the story

Prompt: after Y/n and Ethan broke up a year prior and seeing each other again just pisses off the girl and excites Ethan, they didn’t end their relationship on good terms but he’s still got the feels for her.

Warnings: swearing, ansty

I was walking down the streets of London, my coat wrapped around my waist as I treaded to my apartment.

I have my head down as the weather was foul, the biting winter hitting hard.

I keep walking before I slam into something hard and I hear a soft ‘oof’

I go to apologise but as I look up and make eye contact with the man we both freeze.

“Y/n?”

“Ethan..”

-

Last year, I was working on my photography and YouTube channel, I was big on the side of British commentary and met people that helped me grow, I put more budget into my videos and in 2 years I was one of the biggest female alone British channels.

I met bigger YouTubers and came close with the sidemen, especially Ethan.

We went out and drank together.

We fell in love.

We were happy for 2 and a half years, until June 2023 that was.

He was going out more which was fine, I couldn’t keep him on a lead.

He grew more distant but that’s fine, he’s stressed, I’m not his whole life.

He became more antsy, that’s fine, he needed some space.

I gave him space and he got drunk and fucked Mia Malkova as she stayed in the uk after their recording, I didn’t find out till three weeks later.

The worst thing was he didn’t seem to feel bad at all, I found out through friends of friends.

My heart broke and when I confronted him he got on his knees in front of me and begged.

He said how ‘he was drunk’ and ‘she doesn’t mean anything to him’

He spoke about things he didn’t mean the whole time I started packing my shit with tears pouring down my cheeks.

“Ethan! Stop!” I say in between broken sobs as he tries to hug me but I push him off.

I put all my bags in my car and wipe my eyes as Ethan continues to plead behind me.

“Y/n- I swear! Please don’t go- you mean so-“

I cut him off.

“I’ll send cal round tomorrow for the rest of my shit.”

I slam the door to my BMW and go home, I drive in to my road

I call Callum (Callux) and ask him to come round.

“N/n- is it important?” He said and I responded with a simple ‘yes’

He came round and knocked on my door.

I opened Ito and immediately hugged him.

“Woah, n/n-“ he began as I started to cry again.

“What’s happened..” he muttered to me as he held me to his chest.

I tried to stand up but he shushed me and sat on the floor with me between his legs as I calmed myself down.

His back was against the door as he held me gently.

“… was it Ethan?” He asked me gently as if I’d break if he spoke any louder. I nod between sobs.

I hear him exhale deeply.

“Can- I ask you yes and no questions?” He uses the same time with earnt him another nod.

“Have you broken up?” He asked me with a sickening soft tone, especially for his character.

I respond with another nod.

“Okay- did.. he break up with you or-“

I shake my head and he exhaled again.

After cal realised Ethan had cheated on me, he let me sob into his hoodie for a while.

Keeping away from each other was difficult, especially when he wanted to just ‘talk’.

You can’t excuse sticking your dick in another girl while in a relationship though.

I got my pre recorded videos out when appropriate and announced I was having a break.

Ethan had trouble talking to the boys about what had happened.

“Where’s Y/n? Why’s she having a break?.” Simon commented as they were having a break from the set of their sidemen Sunday.

“What? Oh we broke up.” He said averting his gaze to his finger nails as Tobi chokes on whatever flavour of prime he’s drinking.

“What?! Why? You two are like-“ Tobi sputtered.

“I don’t know lads- I don’t wanna talk about it..”

He started and Harry looked at him.

“What did you do?” Ethan’s face turns a tint of red.

“Not-“

“Mate, what did you do, I’ll just ask cal, they’re like- weird friends. They tell each other everything.” He eyes him, having his own guesses.

Harry starts and Ethan’s mind goes to the way Cal looked at him when he came to collect the rest of Y/na stuff.

He’d never seen him so.. angry.

“I- was drunk boys! I just-“

“You cheated on her? Ethan man..” Josh tuts, clearly disappointed.

“Well-“ he sighs. “Yeah, lads, I did.” Doesn’t even have it in to defend himself. Why should he?

“Mate, you’ve well and truly, fumbled the bag.”Having his friends almost ashamed of him wasn’t good.

They were in the same friendship circle, made videos with the same people, Ethan’s best mates were her best mates, this would cause problems and they knew it.

No sets together. No among us together. No joint colabs. Just. Y/n and Ethan.

On some nights, Y/n went too see Freya and they spoke, one time they got too drunk, Josh heading giggles from the other room before the tone switched up.

“Freya- I- miss him.. maybe it was an accident.. cal told me to-“ I exhale. “Cal told me to not let him get to me- I saw it coming..” I say as I rub my eyes.

“Maybe- he never loved me- you know, he was my first real boyfriend since I was like 17.” I say as tears rim my eyes.

“N/n.. just- let time take its course- maybe, you’ll be okay without him.” She said to me, I could hear how unsure she was.

I nod and sip my wine.

It would never hurt less.

-

“You- look good.” He smiles uncertain, opening his mouth to talk again. “Do- you want to talk?”

“Uhm. No, move the fuck out of my way, Ethan.” I spit, urging him to move from the sidewalk.

“Y/n, please, just a talk.” He pleaded, his blue eyes showing desperation, utter desperation.

“There’s nothing to say!” I say in a defeated tone and meet his eyes.

“I loved you- I don’t understand why- alcohol isn’t an excuse either! I don’t want to talk to you!” I whisper- shout as people swerve around us.

Since before this, we haven’t spoken to each other, at all. In a year and a half. Cal got all my stuff and I could avoid him.

This was a lot right now.

“Y/n- you don’t understand how sorry I am- I hate myself everyday for it! Please- just- a coffee?”

He pleaded, his hands clasped together.

“Once a cheater, always a cheater.”

I shove past him and keep walking.

He stands there, lost.

He wants her back.

He well and truly fumbled the back a year ago, but who was to say he couldn’t get it back?

He turned around and saw his ex girlfriend storm away from him.

He’d take his chances now, he pulled his phone out and called Callux.

“Yes mate?” He picked up after two rings.

“Can you set me up with Y/n? I know- but- I’m just trying to at least make things right.”

No, he wanted her in his bed arms. Both.

He stayed quiet for a while.

“Mate- she.. I don’t think she would want me bringing you up at all- and I’m like her gay best friend- who isn’t gay- so- setting her up is just..”

He trailed off as Ethan thought of something else.

“Just- ask her how she feels about me.”

He says into the phone as his legs take him further down the street.

“Oh I know what she thinks of you- she fucking hates you, she said you broke her heart, you ruined how she looks at men- how she thinks a stupid ginger prick- her words- have her trust issues and how she doesn’t want to miss you.”

He says matter of factly.

“So she misses me?”

Cal sighs: “listen mate- there’s nothing I can do- you can ask freezy to arrange a video or something- that’s your best bet- also- you should like listen to what else I said. Not just the missing bit.”

Ethan sighed down the phone before letting out a small 'yeah, okay' and hung up.

This girl. She trusted him and now what? Would he be that pathetic and got on his knees for her? Yes. Yes he would.

-

“No, fuck off.” I say the second the words leave his mouth.

“N/n it’s a charity video. Are you that much of a bad person to not contribute?” Cal says as his hands grip my shoulders.

His stubbles growing in. That meant another talking stage.

“Yeah. With the sidemen, Cal- Ethan-“ I start. “And don’t guilt trip me.” I huff.

“Yeah. The sidemen. Not your ex boyfriend it’s the sidemen. The YouTube group. No strings attached with so many over people. It’s a massive set. Challenges. A twelve hour stream.” He pleads.

“I’ll be there! Just- I’m begging you!” He shakes me lightly.

I couldn’t say no.

“Okay..”

A week and a half later I was preparing my camera around my neck as i mildly listened listen in on freezy and will talking about F1.

I sigh as I enter the set.

“Ten minutes!”

I sit next to Freya and Cal and lean my head back.

-

His eyes snap up. She came. Looking beautiful.

-

Time passed; the stream went on. I leave set to fill up my water and Ethan is behind me.

“Bella..” he says and I close my eyes.

“Ethan.” I say.

“I- want to say sorry. I didn’t even explain myself at the time properly. I just.. tried to get myself out of trouble.” He says, looking down at me.

“Thank you.” I say reluctantly.

He picks his words carefully from the way his mouth opens and closes a few times.

“I.. miss you.” He says.

“I miss what we were, too.” I say simply and he gulps.

“Can.. we stop avoiding each other? Just.. be.. mutual.” He smiles weakly.

“Okay..”

Maybe I was healing. Well: that was until he called me while drunk.

“Hey pretty..” he slurs.

“You fucked someone else? Drunk, came to say sorry?” I say a little bitterly as I leave my phone on my desk, loudspeaker my fingers editing my video.

“… harsh.. miss you.. just..” he hiccups. “I don’t want your body.. well.. that would be nice.. but, more than anything, n/n.. I want.. I wantchu.. a hug..”

I blink.

“And, just.. i hope.. you can forgive me.. and hug me.. in my heart it’s enough. More than.. enough but in my soul.. fuck, pretty.. I wanna marry you.” He slurs with a small laugh at the end.

“Love you, y/n.” He mumbles after a few minutes of silence.

“I love you too.. I miss you..” I whisper. All the walls I’ve built up cracking. But I hold out.

“Come over when your sober.” He hums and I hang up.

Two days later I get a knock, I open my door and see Ethan, his hands cupped around some water lilies.

“Uh..”

He says.

I take the flowers.

He smiles.

“I.. miss you.. so much.. please.. just..”

I nod and his arms immediately go around me.

“I’m sorry baby..” I say softly. “I just.. can’t.. trust you again..” he gulps and pulls away.

I stick my pinky out.

“Friends?” I ask and his pinky extends too, though shaky.

“Friends.”

Masterlist!

[neuroticbookworm]

Ephemerality of Self-Identity in Only Friends, episode 6

Love, LOVE, LOVE how Only Friends captures the chaos of being in your 20s so fucking brilliantly. Everyone seems self-assured and confident, until a pebble drops and unleashes a wave of hypocrisy and insecurities that reveals more about themselves than the person who threw the stone.

Sand confidently tells his mom him and Ray are just friends who sometimes have fun with each other. But then he goes to some unhinged lengths to execute a twofer: revenge on Top for stealing his ex and on Boston for ruining the perfect fairytale delulu narrative he was building in his head about how Ray and him were becoming a couple.

Top could not stop telling Mew time and again that he has changed for the better and will do anything for him. But the second Sand challenges his new persona and calls his bluff, he gets enraged enough to boast how "He can get anyone he wants" giving away the truth that Mew is a conquest to him, a fresh new experience that is exciting at the moment.

Boston has been the agent of chaos who lives life however the fuck he wants, projecting himself as the most self-assured in the group, but when Ray stormed in and questioned him how could he do this to his friends, to Mew and Top, the first sentence out of Boston's mouth was "I don't hate Mew at all" ...Okay? Boston may proclaim himself as the lone wolf who is above it all, but deep down he also harbours insecurities about his reputation in the sexual marketplace, and the questions of his morality that arises with it, especially compared to someone like Mew, who he knows is not as virginal as he claims to be.

And Mew. Mew who was so fine with being single and inexperienced, Mew who made a boyfriend project out of top-tier Top. The moment he learned about Top's infidelity, all his insecurities came pouring out. "Why did it have to be Boston? Did you guys plan this together? You just wanted to mess with a virgin idiot like me? Did you have fun? Did you laugh about me together in bed?" Oof, Mew. That is some good TopBoston fanfiction.

I know I'm missing many more instances of hypocrisy and insecurities (the Boston-Nick-Gap interaction demands a separate post). But the trend is clear: these character have no idea who they are, who their friends are, and are yet fighting one another about who's winning in life -- according to their own yardsticks (brilliant fight analysis post by my bestie @lurkingshan)

The self-identities of the youth is fleeting and ephemeral, so porous and unstable that a single, well-aimed word can bring it crashing down.

[drchenquill]

Writer Questionnaire~

Thank you @the-golden-comet , @kaylinalexanderbooks and @the-letterbox-archives for the tag!

how long have you had your writing tumblr/writeblr? a fast and loose estimate is fine!

I think a couple of months.

what led you to create it?

I wanted to find a place to share and talk about my stories and OCs and meet other creative minds.

what’s your favourite thing about the writeblr community?

The support. The overflowing creativity that inspires me to keep writing and the lovely people I've met so far.

what’s one thing you’d like your mutuals to know about you?

That I appreciate every type of interaction, really. Even if you want to reach out to ramble about your stories, I always welcome it. ( Although I won't do the first step because I'm socially anxious and awkward)

is there anything you’d like to see more of on your dash?

I like my dash how it is, but I would love more positivity, any kind of positivity. People need to know that they are loved and appreciated, because everyone is.

which wips or writing projects are you noodling about, lately?

I'm currently writing on a WIP called "Daisy." It's a werewolf romance story with some drama sprinkled in.

how long have you been working on them?

God, I don't know. Long? I often forget because I work on others in between so I lose track on when I started what.

do you remember what inspired them/what got you started?

It was born in my "Wattpad-werewolf-story" era. (I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I basically inhaled those type of stories)

how much time, in your best estimation, do you spend thinking about them?

A lot.

when someone asks the dreaded, “what do you write about,” question, what do you usually say?

I usually say I write fantasy-romance, which is just the tip of the iceberg. I don't usually talk about what I write outside of Tumblr, other than my family, and they know exactly what I write about. (I basically force it down their throat)

name any characters you created. side characters, protagonists, antagonists, characters who’ve never been written, the first original abomination you ever pulled from your ass; whomever you’d like!

Oof, my OC list is way too long for this. I'm just going to mention the ones I mentioned here more often:

Leon Martens - Kilian - Margaret Robins - Kiki - Azul - Sophie

who’s the most unhinged?

Okay, I think it would be Atlas. I never, ever, mentioned him, but he is bat shit crazy. One of the first scenes of his story, he jumps from one moving car to another, laughing like a maniac. But right after him comes Azul.

who comes the most naturally for you to write?

I think Azul.

do you ever cringe at them?

Yeah, sometimes I write some cheesy sentences and cringe a bit, but I love it~

how much control do you feel you have over your characters? do they ever “write themselves,” refuse to cooperate, or do things you didn’t expect? to what degree? are some less cooperative than others?

NONE. These bastards don't care what I have planned for them, they just do what they please.

do you enjoy people asking questions about your characters? and do you have a preferred means of receiving said questions? for example, as asks, as replies, as reblogs, as tag notes, as comments on ao3, etc.

I love, love, love, love getting questions about my babies. In any shape or form.

what makes you want to follow another writeblr account? do you follow ‘em as you see ‘em, or take time scoping out the blog to make sure you align with its content? do you follow based on wips, or vibes?

I follow based on vibes, I think. But mostly because I'm very much interested in the stories.

what makes you decide against following?

Easy, if I feel like they are a bad person or if our morals don't align.

do you interact with non-mutuals often?

Not that often.

do your mutuals’ characters occupy space in your noodle?

YES! A LOT! Some honorable mentions: Dr. Tievis, brought to life by the lovely @finickyfelix (he is a little meow meow. I know he wants to fuck monsters, but nobody is perfect.) Vesperine by another lovely person @theink-stainedfolk (she is beauty, she is grace) Marsh by yet another lovely person @paeliae-occasionally (I know he kills a lot, but I don't judge a man by his hobbies) and recently I've wanted to adopt Tenshi by the lovely @the-golden-comet (but I was told someone was faster)

This is just the top, there are so many more because you lovely people have such a beautiful and creative minds that you always amaze me with your creations.

~~~`

Thank you for reading this far. I love you~ (very platonically but very affectionately)

Tagging for this with no pressure @theink-stainedfolk , @finickyfelix , @thecomfywriter , @paeliae-occasionally , @davycoquette , @oliolioxenfreewrites open tag~

[simlit]

3, 6, 7, 9, 13, 19, 22, 24, 25, for VEN

What is your OCs fatal flaw? Are they aware of this flaw?

In his current state? Probably his selflessness. He gives too much to people and has a hard time drawing lines if it's someone he deeply cares about. Case in point, letting Naida more or less railroad the entire family into chasing the Fountain of Youth. In his defense, Naida isn't really someone you can win fights against, but considering the dangerous nature of the voyage, one would think he should have fought against it a lot harder. I do think he's aware of it, but not in a way he can actively check, because it's a lot of him overcompensating for the way he used to be and the things he's done. So I guess a larger and probably more fatal flaw is the fact that he carries around so much guilt and does a lot in the name of reparations.

How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass?

Easily, but tbh I feel this is one thing Ven shares with Kato. His morals can be bent depending on who is involved and the consequence of the situation. Ven isn't standing on moral highground in the first place, despite understanding right and wrong well enough. He certainly doesn't care enough about authority not to break rules, and as far as life or death is concerned, a life will always matter less to him if they're at odds with someone he loves. That being said, I think he's resourceful enough to find ways around making risky choices.

What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?

Also a really fun question, cuz I haven't thought about it in years LOL. Though Ven stayed mostly the same from conception, he was supposed to be a bit more "roguish" even after his Reaper years. More of the typical pirate: loose, unkempt and thieving. But he ended up being way more charitable and straightlaced than I'd initially planned, but that ironed itself out almost immediately so I don't really consider it to have been "the plan" just "what I had had in mind at some point" lmao. Now the idea of Ven sleeping around with literally anyone is goddamn baffling to me.

Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

Every single word of his theme song, "The Balancer's Eye" by Lord Huron, but all of this: Nothing's waiting for us in the great sky Life is equal to dust in the Balancer's eye Now I know that I can't lift an old curse Tell me, how does a man change the universe? Will I ever be forgiven for the crime of my life? Will it haunt me till I die? To the end of time?

If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

I think Ven is one of the few characters I can genuinely answer "yes" to this question lmao. Just because Ven is hands down the least judgmental of my OCs, not to mention packing all that charisma, he can literally talk to anyone. Although I probably would just be dead on the floor so it wouldn't be a very interesting conversation.

How does your OC behave when enraged?

We so rarely see Ven angry. Honestly, a bit like Kyrie, Ven has a quiet temper. He's good at restraining himself now, because he knows intimately well just how horrible of a person he can be, so he makes a concerted effort never to let anything get him that upset. Mostly, things don't anger him as much as he may be disappointed or saddened. There is one scene in OST:O I've had planned for years that actually showcases Ven's true anger and it is very much "silent and lethal" lmao.

What character alignment would you consider your OC to be?

Oof, I dunno, somewhere between neutral good and chaotic neutral. Hard to pinpoint lol

What is an alternative life path your OC might have gone done? How different would their life be if they'd made those decisions?

Oh, this one is interesting. I think Ven could have easily continued down the path he started on when he got the sight. That is, had he not been able to pull himself back from that maniacal person he'd become as consequence, he'd be unrecognizable today. That's not to say he isn't already because he absolutely was that person for a moment in time. The Reaper King wasn't just a persona, it was his entire essence. He was ruthless, violent and he did very literally kill dozens (I won't say 100s but it's up there) of people. We like to imagine him as the loving father and perfect husband he is now, but outside of maybe Elsera he's my OC with the highest bodycount. And while in a way you could justify he killed people because "they deserved to die" he was never in the right to pass that judgement. Had he not eventually woken up from that state of trauma and derangement, he'd still be a completely unstable murderous lunatic .-.

What is your favorite thing about your OC?

How hot he is. The end.

[otaku-tactician]

2, 17 and 22 about Gilgamesh and Mori for the character ask 🌝

Hello, thank you very much for the ask! I appreciate this a lot. Hmm, both Gilgamesh and Mori! This will definitely be challenging, so I will have to work off vibes for these two guys as well.

I've written answers for Gilgamesh first and Mori second if thats ok? Thank you!

Gilgamesh Character Asks

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

I think the one Gilgamesh headcanon that I'm the most annoying about is the belief that Gilgamesh doesn't always have lofty goals behind his intentions; and that he can definitely partake in morally gray actions purely for the sake of it sometimes.

This is a VERY unpopular opinion- particularly in the wake of fate works revealing that Gilgamesh often acts as an impenetrable opponent as a means of 'fostering the growth of his people'; but at times I believe Gilgamesh can be a wanton and arbitrary King who does things based off a whim sometimes. Yes, I do understand that Gilgamesh is also an incredibly smart servant- who plans many things in advance, but some of his behaviors do strike me as very uncouth and sadistic, and they're not always for a noble end goal.

I don't believe that all he has done has to be justified. It's okay that Gilgamesh is fucked up. Acceptance and tolerance are two very different things, but I only learnt this recently.

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

OOF this is a very hard question, sans for the canonical instrumental songs that are canonically associated with Gilgamesh, there are a few that make me think of him but... I'm trying to remember which ones...

LMAOO FOR SOME REASON THIS SONG RANDOMLY CAME INTO MY HEAD?! (I first heard this song during a Madara AMV for Naruto Shippuden????) This one is heavy metal.

I'm looking over the lyrics, and it's about an absolutely terrifying king of annihilation. Well... I guess there is some relevance, then.

There was also a Nier:Automata song (Song of the Ancients I think) that played in a Gilgamesh fgo gameplay video, so I tend to associate this song with him too:

But I don't really have a personal connection to this song, per se. I admit, I tend not to make playlists for my blorbos sadly. But sometimes I will see a tumblr post and go 'GILGAMESH!!!!'

22. Best Physical Feature

HIS EYES. I could drink in those pools of glistening red forever. My god, what a rich shade of red! Other than that he is handsome.

NEXT UP IS MORI AYYYYY

Mori Nagayoshi Character Ask

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

That there is method to his madness. Mori Nagayoshi may be very blunt and can definitely misread the atmosphere; as well as act in ways that may seem a bit 'dumb'; but deep in my heart, I believe that he is actually very intelligent. There is just something about Mori that screams to me 'he knows more than he lets on'. Maybe this is just me though, as he can appear as a bit dense XD

Maybe this is just me, but beneath all of his chaos and bloodlust, there is a chilling sense of... someone who is making the most out of what hand he's been dealt. He does seem unusually nonchalant about some hard-hitting things, but as I have grown and learnt more about the many ways in which people cope with hardship, I have learnt that this is the way how characters like him cope. They live in the moment, they go wild, they accept the reality... damn, Mori is kind of a mystery to me as well XD

ANOTHER HILL I WILL DIE ON! Sorry, this one is a bit NSFW but!!!! Although Mori is rough and wild I BELIEVE 100% DEEP IN MY HEART that Mori Nagayoshi would be very good to who he is indulging in physical intimacy with! I think he may be clumsy at times but he has the spirit, I believe in him wholeheartedly.

AND A THIRD HILL I WILL DIE ON! I love his rare meek and blushy side when he gets a bit vulnerable. MORI NAGAYOSHI IS CUTE! I REFUSE TO BELIEVE HE ISN'T CUTE! HE IS ONE OF THE CUTEST IN FGO!

17. Quotes, songs, poems, etc. that I associate with them

Oh crap omg a poem just came in my head

Amongst the blood-red moon, The lark sings. With spider lilies for veins He bleeds forth a river, A never-ending deluge.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Also a song? To be honest, I don't have any playlists for Mori but this GUDAGUDA fgo ost reminds me of him ^^ Just in a vibes kind of way (I was unable to complete the GUDAGUDA event with him in it, sadly!)

TT-TT It's a very moving and emotional final battle theme, definitely the kind of battle I'd love to take a guy like him to.

22. Best Physical Feature

To me personally, there is no best feature for Mori Nagayoshi. The WHOLE PACKAGE is freaking sexylicious!!!!! Phwoar, Mori Nagayoshi is very beautiful to me personally, from those fiery red locks, to those stunning ochre yellow and red ringed eyes; that bulky build and his massive teeth.

He is very pretty ^^

Thank you for the ask, my answers are completely off the wall in this one

[messydiabolical]

Mass Effect Tag Game

I was tagged by @illusivesoul, thank you! <3 I'll tag in @shadowthehedgehog1 @angstyastro @zet-sway @stormikins @bluerose5 @jtownnn @yellingaboutmasseffect @callista-curations @impishbiscuit @spookyvalentine @skittidyne @jadevakarian But I could be tagging all day so please everyone join in if you'd like and no worries if you don't!

Here's the blank questions, and my answers are below the cut!

I am a fan since: Favourite game of the series?: MShep or FShep?: Earthborn, Colonist or Spacer?: Biotics or Tech: Paragon or Renegade: Favourite Class: Favourite Companion: Least favourite Companion: My squad selection: Favourite In-game romance: Other pairings I like: Favourite NPC: Favourite Antagonist: Favourite Mission: Favourite Loyalty Mission: Favourite DLC: Control, Synthesis or Destroy: Favourite Weapon: Favourite Place: A quote I like:

My answers:

I am a fan since:Legendary Edition release (better late than never!)

Favourite game of the series?:2 wins overall, due to how much I loved learning about the new companions and all their little side quests and the excitement of prepping for the big mission. 3 has the best overall mechanics though, and the npc’s being able to banter is top notch.

MShep or FShep?: Both, but I tend to create themsheps anyway.

Earthborn, Colonist or Spacer?:Keahi is a colonist, Blaise a spacer AU. I think all the backgrounds have juicy potential but find the idea of growing up out there in this big new galaxy exciting. 

Biotics or Tech:Probably tech for my sheps, but I love having a biotic in the squad as backup. I’ll usually have 1 biotic ability as my Shep’s bonus and chalk it up to funky side effects of how they resurrected Shep in 2.

Paragon or Renegade:Generally paragon but some renegade interrupts.

Favourite Class:Infilitrator. Sniper Rifles are always my fave (or archers in fantasy games).

Favourite Companion: Such a tough question. As there’s a romance question later, i’ll save Thane for then. I’m also going to answer as me rather than who my shep’s would pick. I think Mordin is honestly the companion I got most excited about going to chat with or hearing unique lines from. And while not ‘companions’, I have such soft spots for Traynor and Cortez and consider them honourary squaddies.

Least favourite Companion:I mean there are plenty who I think have questionable morals/ideas/attitudes, but it doesn’t make me dislike them, it makes them interesting and gives fresh perspectives, so this is also a tough question. I feel bad for saying it, but I guess Liara? Only in that she gets so much priority in 1 and 3 but I don’t find her as interesting to chat with compared to others and also found her going from nerdy excitable anxious dork in 1 to ‘flay your mind’ corpo bad bitch in 2 gave me whiplash. The fact she sold shep’s body is another point deducted. And the way she let Shepard drop like hot shit in shadowbroker too, oof. I really don’t dislike her though and still find her overall character interesting.

My squad selection:I change it up a lot so I get to hear all the different things they have to say

Favourite In-game romance:Thane, followed by Steve Cortez and Samantha Traynor. Is anyone surprised?!

Other pairings I like:Feron x Kolyat, Thane X Cortez (why romance them separately when I can put them together instead!) Femshep x Miranda. I tend to headcanon my shep’s as older than the in game age so Jack feels too young for them, but I do love the Jack romance generally. 

Favourite NPC:That one completely chill smoking salarian in the citadel DLC. Dandenbo’s icon always makes me grin reminding me of him. Also the salarian Thane rescued who had his whole world rocked and wrote an email about it. You go you funky little horny guy.

Favourite Antagonist:TIM is interesting because you get that having to work together and resenting the hell out of it aspect in 2. And look he’s by no means an effective antagonist, but Donovan Hock is objectively very funny.

Favourite Mission:The suicide mission. It isn’t the best mechanically, but it’s very satisfying after working towards it the whole game and getting yourself as ready as can be.

Favourite Loyalty Mission:Thane, i’m biased. Grunt’s rite of passage is also just fun.

Favourite DLC:I’ll go with 1 from each game. Bring down the sky- I just find something pretty satisfying about pootling around shutting the 3 rockets off and finding all the little out the way side bits. And that view! Lair of the Shadowbroker- Feron my beloved. Gotta save my boy. Leviathan- felt like a breath of fresh air with the piecing together clues, and such a great creepy atmosphere. You really finish it feeling like ‘this may help, but at what cost?’ and it feels significant.

Control, Synthesis or Destroy:So funny story, I got so confused the first time I played and kind of panicked, completely missed that you could choose to run a different direction and just ran full pelt forwards yeeting shepard to the centre. When that activated synthesis I spent the next 40 odd minutes watching my computer in growing utter horror/confusion. Anyway destruction is the actual choice but fuck that whole ‘this has to genocide the geth and Edi’ thing fuuuuuck.

Favourite Weapon:Upgrading to the widow is nice but I am quite fond of the M-97 Viper in earlier/lower levels, the 6 shot mag is especially favourable.

Favourite Place:I really love the brutalist architecture of Port Hanshan.

A quote I like:

I dare to assume you ignorant jackasses know that space is empty. Once you fire this hunk of metal, it keeps going til it hits something. That can be a ship, or the planet behind that ship. It might go off into space and hit somebody in 10,000 years. If you pull the trigger on this, you are ruining someone’s day, somewhere and sometime!

[butmakeitgayblog]

what do you think of linctavia? they seem cute but wasn’t octavia 16/17 and lincoln like… 25 if we’re being generous 😭

😬

Oof. Um. Ok well. I'm gonna hate on this probably but uhhhh, yyyeah I've always thought they were... how can I say this gently.... They were gross

Hear me out!

They were cute together, and overall I loved Lincoln's character. I did and still do and that's why he'll always be a teddy bear in any fics he shows up in. And yes, I can understand why some people genuinely liked them together. But if we remove the shipper goggles? Bruh. He was a 25yo (according to what I can find) grown ass man pursuing a 16yo child. Be so honest c'mon. And, arguably an incredibly important factor here, not only was Octavia 16, but she was a naive and sheltered 16. She'd spent her entire life up until those few weeks on the ground living under the floorboards ffs. Her entire existence was soley based around Bellfuck and their mother. She had no life experience, no real practical learned common sense, no social education. She was, by all perimeters, a child. That's not to say someone of a similar age who wasn't as sheltered is somehow more adult or anything, but there is a naïveté factor even beyond the morality of it. I realize theloo did everything they could to try and downplay that and negate it by magically making Octavia this wordly and spunky ~fast learner~ (so you're saying she's just - what? ,,, mature for her age? Is that what you were saying, Jason?🤨🧐 that man needs to answer for his crimes), but baby if it quacks like a duck it's a gd duck

So I mean, if I'm being totally honest, yeah it was gross 🤷‍♀️ if we're gonna sit here and criticize Bellfart for sleeping with underage girls then ya gotta hold the same energy for Lincoln who arguably stepped over that line every bit as much. Just because it was one girl vs several doesn't change that. Like this man was old enough to rent a car. Dude had a Grounder 401k plan and was dating the equivalent to a sophomore/junior in high school. We have to be fr here. In any other context there wouldn't be a question.

All that said, they were cute together and the actors did a good job of giving them chemistry and making the couple one that felt real, so there is that at least

[bisamwilson]

hey dear!! 9, 12 and 18 for the choose violence ask game 💖

hello dear! thanks for the ask <3 (from this list)

9. worst part of canon

sam continually getting sidelined in the mcu. his story got pushed aside a hell of a lot for bucky's storyline in tfatws (and some of the writing to resolve what we did get of sam's story... oof) and now he's barely in any other projects and we get so little news of him. avengers con in ms marvel had like 2 or 3 different uso show girls but no captain america sam wilson????? seriously???? not to mention the fact that cap4 seems to just be a hulk movie with sam added in. it only ever gets more frustrating with each piece of news or each little scrap of sam they give us

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

at least in a lot of the circles i'm in people hate peggy so i'm doing peggy. i know she's popular elsewhere but i so rarely see peggy love so here we go

peggy's a complicated character. she's tough and she's clever and she's strong and she's bullheaded and she's done horrible things bc she thought it furthered her end goal, and people hate on her for the latter, which i do understand, but like. it's no different from a lot of the characters people love that did something similar? tony made a robot that tried to destroy the earth bc he thought it was gonna be beneficial. nick fury actively authorized and participated in building a program that could eliminate anyone deemed a threat from space at the push of a button, because he thought that's what was needed for national security/safety. peggy fucked up, sure, but it's not like she didn't do a lot of good as well.

she's more than handy in a fight. she disobeyed direct orders to help steve go to azzano and rescue bucky and the rest of the 107th. she was an important part of mission planning for the howling commandos, to the point that we see all the commandos that are left by the time agent carter happens respect her as a leader. she willingly drops the last bit of steve's blood, which is one of very few things she has left of him, into the water because she knows it could be used for horrible things, even though it killed her to do it. she disobeys orders again to try and clear howard stark's name, and doesn't give up until his name has been cleared. she gave us the absolutely fantastic line "i know my value. anyone else's opinion doesn't really matter"

i just think peggy's a genuinely interesting, morally complicated character whose flaws people would celebrate as being interestingly morally gray or whatever if she wasn't a woman in the middle of a favored white man ship is all. and i think she's more than what people make her out to be

(also her and steve knew each other for two years, which is practically a lifetime in wwii, before steve went into the ice. stop making the "left for a girl he knew for two weeks" jokes. they're inaccurate and they discount a very important relationship steve had during the war, even if you don't think he and peggy would last based on the experiences steve had in modern times)

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

sarah wilson! i wish i saw more content made of her, and i want to see more fics where she's not just sam or bucky's voice of reason, and she gets to have her own storylines, or just gets to have fun with her brother/brother-in-law

send me a # and i'll answer the question from the "choose violence" ask list!

[altaneenarts]

Tag game from @amoxilwrites

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

10 all for DSMP

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

162,320 (oml that's a lot)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just DSMP rn

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) in the doorway with you a zombie!george dnf fic based on mushie's apocalypse AU

2) perpetuam memoriam king!george/assassin!dream au

3) The Divine Right DSMP canon-divergent platonic dnf fic where c!George rescues c!Dream with the help of DreamXD (this action has consequences)

4) the crown, the shadow the prequel to "perpetuam memorial"

5) Communion a sequel to "in the doorway with you"

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love answering comments especially if a reader has a question. I'm happy to talk about my fics or characterizations with others. I've made some good friends this way :)

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm well I'd say some of the ones I'm writing now have angstier endings, but of those I have published it's probably "The Divine Right" simply because of how long the fic is. (SPOILERS) It's about losing what you thought you had regained and coming to grips with the truth that the person you knew is no longer what they once were.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The End post DSMP finale fic where DreamXD saves c!George from the nuke

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope. I have yet to get any real hate comments lol.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

So far, no. I've written short snippets of hypothetical scenarios which @amoxilwrites has enjoyed lol. But if I ever publish any, it'll be very character/plot driven. I want the smut to have meaning and give a look inside who the characters are or progress the story somehow—I just find it more engaging that way.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Yes, back on an old account for the Hannigram fandom.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship

Oof of all time? As much as I love DNF, nothing will compare to Destiel (sorry gamers lol)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Hmm now that depends on what you consider a wip XD I have many planned/brainstormed but of the ones I've actually started writing I think I can finish them all, it'll just take a long while.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Atmosphere/description (I love setting the tone), metaphors, and dialogue

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I can't write pure fluff/happiness for the life of me. I can only write happiness in the contrast of sadness. I also struggle with modern settings as my dialogue tends to lean towards poeticness more than realism. Too many metaphors. Whenever I edit, I always try to cut down my metaphors to one at a time instead of a bunch of wordiness that'll tire out a reader.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done it with Enokian from Supernatural which was very painful given that it's not a complete language and the translators that exist aren't always accurate. So it was a lot of coming up with multiple ways to say a sentence until one was translatable. I also translate Latin pretty often (even now for "perpetuam memoriam") I'll never claim that it's accurate but I do often double check what I want to say through multiple translators before the final draft.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Technically Harry Potter, but I first posted fics for Supernatural

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I'm really happy with how "perpetuam memoriam" is going so far but of those that are complete I'd say "Communion". I really enjoy capturing a morally grey character whose logic is different from the norm in order to rationalize their life; how they can be vicious and kind.

oh gosh i feel like a dsmpblr noobie what other writers do i know well enough to tag *sweats* I think I'll just leave this open to whoever wants to join :D that way I can get to know yall better and can tag you next time lol

[storiesofsvu]

happy thursday fuckers... you know whats up

Here we go… backwards viewing. We starting with OC. Let’s see if I give two fuck about whats going on…

That therapist looked and sounded super familiar… where do I know him from? Was he fins rope guy? Brb…ugh… its not on imdb yet… *sigh*

Not me looking like a clown reading the opening credits of all THREE shows for guest stars waiting for my fave to pop back up…

I JUST realized that when I was TRYING to fucking watch the last episode on citytv the app/site kept glitching and freezing and I never finished it… that’s why I have NO idea whats going on LOLOL

This show would be so much better without Elliot… also If they gave Ayanna her wife back..

I literally like every detective on this show except for Elliot.

Jamie’s bomb. Also hot. 10/10 would bang

Welp. Okay. That felt over quick yet also took 5 hours to get through this damn episode.

Onto mothership;

Yeah fuck this guy… you’re in nyc… you’re gonna step in some shit. I want to punch you.

“morales” are you kidding me? Can we stop reusing names of recurring characters?? I get, diff show but still same universe.

I would prefer this show if it was just Mechad & Odelya… OH and Kate.

Completely unrelated; someone pls remind me to put together a grocery list/meal prep list of things super easy so I stop ordering fucking delivery. I need to get that shit together.

Mechad just *yelled* and I *felt things* jfc

What TF is senator paley doing here?! Where is keane to spit in his face. Get this man off my tv pls.

Ugh fuck this asshat. This is horrible. But also… we’ve done this storyline in older episodes… alex & casey have both gotten people out of ICE. Cmon sam… where was your paperwork…

OOF she brought her big balls to this… hello m’am

FUCK defence attorneys who attack the character of a prime witness just because they’re there illegally. Like, fuck off, you had her detained in the first place.

Wow okay, fucking heartbreaking ending, way to just hurt Sam.. baby.. is okay… I will cuddle you back to happiness.

FINALLY, okay here we go svu. Ive heard some interesting things about the ep… let’s see

I don’t know if I’m ready for this…

DID WE REALLY HAVE TO REVISIT THE ROLIVIA GOODBYE?!?! AS IF I HAVE NOT SOBBED OVER IT ENOUGH!??

DID SHE LEAVE THE FUCKING CHIPMUNK?? WTF?? IVE HAD SO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT IT FOR YEARS

Ugh…. The fin amanda dynamic was always such a fucking good one… I will miss them

Okay I d love that Duarte still watches out for/hangs out with muncy

Who… once again is wearing plaid… like the queer she is…

When is mcgrath gonna fucking meet his rotten end… I need him gone…

Oh THANK GOD noah doesn’t fully witness this?? I was so concerned.

Somehow… that wasn’t as bad as I expected it to be? And I KNOW this is probably leading up to other shit that certain fans really want to see, but like, can we give olivia a damn break please? *eyeroll*

Also it’s just plain pathetic to only have two detectives. Like… I know molly replaced kelli, but we really still need another one… OR make the ada a more prominent feature, add in huang/a shrink, the ME, make there be more of a larger rotating cast like s8/9….

Omg fin lololol

“you have a visitor…” andits FUCKING MCGRATH ugh what a way to make things worse…

Okay… m’am… you were doing so well this season, and now we’re back to the super breathy acting.. why…

Im glad they keep mentioning Phoebe, like, the writers haven’t forgotten about her so that’s a good sign.

Im SORRY. She keeps a SHOTGUN in an UNLOCKED closet?? WITH NOAH IN THE HOUSE?!?!

Anyone else super confused as to how her ribs aren’t broken? Or at least cracked? Like… it really seems like it..

Okay… her lingering on amanda’s empty desk is giving me s13 flashbacks, like, amanda would have reached out…. She’s literally married to someone olivia sees on a regular basis.

I’m hot for Duarte now and I fully blame @bulletproof for that….

Wait… I just saw a commercial for Chicago PD… I watched the new ep right before my l&o viewings… was Hank even in this week’s ep??

Omg muncy was so fucking excited to take off the blazer lolololol

Who TF is this guy… detective Bruno…. I swear I know him from somewhere

Oh… okay… he’s been on svu 5 times before… (as different characters… the one being the husband of the woman who accused Stone of assault)

This ep is meh. There’s too much fin and olivia and this new fuck I don’t care about, give me the characters I *want* to see pls.

Seriously… why must police always think that people know about their HALF siblings?!? People be whores… I didn’t know I had THREE half brothers til I was 14…

Overall… this was underwhelming.

I know it’s a three parter (I believe?) so like, there’s more coming, but like… underwhelming as a whole. I’m not even going to bother to gif any of it this week. Sorry not sorry besties.

[ladyryukyo]

maybe your five favorite characters besides Kyoya and Ryuga and why you like them? :)

oof besides kyoya and ryuga? you're really making this hard for me JGSJFGJSJ

1. kenta

im thinking about this as characters im obsessed enough with that i could imagine writing solo fic for just them. kenta is such a brainrot character, he has grown so much in the seasons and still has so much more potential to grow. his relationships with other characters are often super fascinating, for example with ryuga, but also with gingka or benkei or yu. i feel like he has so many depths i havent even started to explore yet, either in fic or just in my thoughts. i love him. silly little guy, but tries so hard to be a grown-up. i want to wrap him in a blanket but simultaneously let him go out into the world with no preparation just to see how he fares.

2. hikaru

she is like the cool older cousin you always love to see at family dinners, who you want to be like when you grow up and maybe even have a little bit of a crush on like damn she is badass and i love her. she is also one of the few characters with an actual backstory kind of? at least more than what other characters have and i like that i can build on that and flesh her out more based on what information canon gave us. i dont know how it is in the english or japanese dub but i am also completely in love with her german dub voice, everytime i watch mfb and she speaks i fall for her again

3. benkei

big guy, bestest friend, strong arms, warm smile, best hugs,, literal sunshine. benkei has so many interesting relationships with other people and basically gets along with everyone, he is such a good friend and i want to see him be friends with everyone and be appreciated everywhere. on the other hand, i want him to prove himself a little bit, too. go further than this role as everyone's friend that he is so comfortable in. show what he can do, that he is super strong, that he struggles, that he can fail and succeed, that the story can be about him sometimes, instead of whoever's sidekick he is at the current moment.

4. yu

similar reasons to kenta except his story and struggles are kind of backwards to kenta's? he starts so strong and fusion is definitely my favorite season for him where he is cocky and a serious opponent, people are actually scared of facing him, his sarcastic quips when he battles?? i adore him. but after fusion he gets pushed more and more into the background which i think is unfortunate but also v interesting for his character and his insecurities. also i love to think about his relationships with tsubasa and with ryuga and doji. plus, what little we know of his backstory is kind of insane?

5. chris

i can see everyone judging me for this but the jokes about him being a boring cishet white guy have got to stop guys im serious!!1! okay but jokes aside, i do really like chris because his backstory appealed to me. i like the whole concept of a blader for hire. i mentioned this in the favorite tropes ask but i love characters with gray morality which i think applies to chris. the starting as an antagonist, not questioning the motives of my employers, then switching sides when i realize its not simply a job and i have been played DFSLSADFL yes good, make him feel guilty, torment him more lol. i'd love to explore his past some more and discover what else he did for questionable people and if he feels any guilt about that.

honorary mentions: tsubasa, dashan, demure, zeo

[libertasforte]

Oof yeah I forgot about & I agree with the part that Childe would not want to be taken care of.

She views herself as a masculine being (in some way) and she sees that ego extension of that part of herself in Childe. And so she classifies him to that side and she is tough to him - and this is probably something that Childe appreciates in some way and prefers to the alternative. (That sacrifice bit is random, but it’s like - she would sacrifice herself if she was a man - because she isn’t; she takes a random man and sacrifices him in her stead.) So as much as I think they are great caretakers for each other, Childe doesn’t want to be taken care of (and neither does Arlecchino).

And this is where I’m like - just get over yourselves and choose to be taken care of - but this is how the mommy&child dynamics come in, I think. Why it’s mommy&child if this is a relation of mutual care - I think this is a gender thing, like I think women are generally more taken care of by “society” (so like, random people) (under some definition of “take care”) than men, so the man is more dependent on that mutual care than the woman is. I think it’s more complicated than that, but anyway. And Arlecchino is so dominant. Lmao. Manipulative and controlling. (And anyway, in my head at least, they have gotten over the “take care of each other” part, which is why I had forgotten about this…)

I like what you’re saying with how Arlecchino is not Kind, but Good - however, this might be a difference in interpretation, or a difference in picking apart the nuance of certain words, but. I don’t consider Arlecchino to be Good, and I don’t think she considers herself to be Good. What I think is that she is Principled, and that her principles derive outwards from her ego. I think that she is logical and rational in an internal way that reads as insanity when it is seen from the outside (like a “rational agent” in economics - what is that; other than an insane person?) I think that she is moralizing; which is different from Good. Her role is that of the accuser; the adversary; who was never considered Good. I do think she is Harsh; but I also think she is Kind. She was Harsh to Focalors and Neuvillette. But she was still Kind in action, like bringing her her favorite cake.

I think that her character is about effectiveness. She is Harsh because it is effective. She is not Cruel; because Cruelty is not effective. The presence of Kindness is usually, always more effective than the absence of Kindness. And Kindness used for Effect is often called hypocrisy; the Harbingers call her as much.

Good is, very often, not effective; for that reason, she is often, not Good. It is effective to be considered Good; it is not necessarily to be Good. (And so, I think “ineffectual” would be the measure by which she uses to weigh Childe.) Another thing that Arlecchino might say is that it is more effective to be Feared rather than to be Loved.

And all this makes it sound like she is some sort of super Psychopath; she is not; this effectiveness is just the internal logic by which she operates and is baked into the bones of her character. She lives in a body with every part marked by Intent.

But her lack of Goodness is - and this is the question of her treatment of Childe - on a meta level, I think the question is like, would Arlecchino punish Childe (for being out of line) - and for me, my choice is, at least - I love her because I want her to be radically amoral.

(What does this mean? I think there’s this dynamic of how men police each other, and women do it to men too. You can argue all day about how Childe was a terrorist who tried to sink Liyue. But it just feels good to hit Childe (unfortunately for him) (problematic comment of the day). You keep on hitting him week after week and you start inventing evils for him to be accountable for. What I like Arlecchino for is for her ability to be articulate of things like this. For me, this clarity makes it so that it doesn’t feel entirely insane to be Childe. But when you get to this level, why would she care for someone who is in a worse position than her, especially if it comes at cost to herself? And so I feel like there has to be something that necessitates their relation of mutual care on Arlecchino’s side. But also I think they’re just two shattered parts of a whole -)

Recently, I started looking into the mythology of the Baba Yaga - she may be from Fontaine but she has been adopted by Snezhnaya - she is an evil being who, due to existing outside the norms of society, catalyzes change for the better. She eats children. I think that’s the direction I like for her.

At this point, also; is Childe good? (Not capital G Good - because I don’t think that ever applies to him.) 

Childe does not regard himself as good, he said as much. What I think of him is that he is a force of nature, like a tornado; or a hurricane. And the Harbingers regard him as such; which is why they keep him as far away as possible from their delicate plans. Childe saving Fontaine reminds me of the original meaning of the phrase “kamikaze” - this phrase originates from back when the Mongols were taking over the entirety of Asia; they tried to invade Japan too.

They tried to invade Japan two times. Both times, what happened was that there came a hurricane that sunk pretty much their entire fleet. It happened twice. If you had a nickel every time that happened, you’d have two nickels.

The hurricane killed many soldiers. They called it: kamikaze; the winds of god.

Although he is from Snezhnaya, I love that his talent books are from Mondstadt, for freedom; as a storm, as a hurricane, he is not just water, but also a child of the wind (and he even has his delusion for the lightning…)

Is a hurricane good or evil? Is it such a bad thing, to stare into the hurricane, and to call it beautiful?

What I like the most about Childe, his best and most redeeming quality, what has me going at times “wait but maybe Childe is the best person actually, morally” - (although I can see how from a different perspective, this could be what people hate about him, as it reads as an avoidance of accountability and responsibility -) is his ability to take any situation he is in, to take it at face value, and to care about it. “Tartaglia” is the man with many faces, and to be him is to care and give all to whatever and whomever is right in front of him, all the time. It is his ability to choose and affirm life.

To take the religious interpretation, maybe we can assert that all that God made is Good - and that it is human Artifice and Intent (as embodied by Arlecchino; the Devil) - that made Evil -

Aside. If Childe did die fighting the star-devouring narwhal, he also fulfills the modern meaning of the phrase “kamikaze” - in order to buy time to stave off an imminent disaster, cast down by the powers that be for a crime that he didn’t commit, to die in a watery grave…

Aside  2. You know how Childe’s Foul Legacy form is based off of the Japanese super sentai, who are Japanese superheroes? Just like how American superheroes originally represented the power and might of the American military, Japanese superheroes represented the power and might of the Japanese army. And he tried to sink Liyue, a Chinese harbor city. I feel like the reference isn’t exactly subtle.

Footnote. When I say good/bad, I’m defining it as how I think of their character, and not about their actions taken. When you look at the next effect of positive/negative value to the world (at least from what we know in the plot), then Arlecchino is probably good, and Childe is probably bad. But this utilitarian good/bad is different from the good/bad of their character as people (to use an extreme example, a guy who causes a car crash that kills 10 people isn’t necessarily a morally bad person). Like people who say that it’s fine that Childe tried to sink Liyue because he knew that Morax was going to stop it - like okay, maybe he is not morally bad, but at least he is incredibly criminally negligent.

Assigning a moral value to Childe presupposes his agency; as I said that Childe is a hurricane. As for Arlecchino, I don’t want her to be morally good; I want her to be beyond morally good. I want morality to be another tool in her toolbox.

thank you childe

[dobbywantsyoursocks]

Ohoho I am playing a dangerous game going through the tags of The Fever King when I'm only halfway though~

[fmayyy]

just thinking about how Harrow's moral approach was to let 50,000 of his own people die with absolutely no contingency plan and how his measured idealism only really serves to make him feel better about himself regardless of the loss of life it results in anyway yall can go ahead and block me now

[idontdowellunderpressure]

Garou's "Crush"

I wanted to make this little meta as soon as I read Chapter 170. Long story short, I couldn't at the time, but I can now and apparently there's some discourse going on? IDK. There's a reason I generally avoid Twitter ￣へ￣

Anyways, here's my two cents about that time Murata tried to "no-homo" Garou and, in my opinion, ended up backfiring wonderfully. Keep in mind, this is coming from an asexual, so my understanding about sexuality and romantic attraction may be skewed.

So, let's digest this panel:

In it, Bang makes the valiant attempt to bond over what he thinks is a safe subject matter. Garou's a young man, right? And what do all teenage boys have in common? Their raging hormones and crushes, obviously. Only, Garou doesn't seem all to keen to discuss this particular topic. Blabbing about the rotten morality of so-called "heroes" to some random stranger? A-okay. Admitting he has a crush to his father figure? Atrocious.

In fact, look at the facial expressions Garou's making:

Dude is looking like he's gay straight up not having a good time. He looked shocked and anxious and uncomfortable (just look at that sweat). And, yeah, the phrase "if you twist my arm" can, and frequently is, taken to be more sarcastic than genuine, Garou isn't really someone known for masking his feelings all that well. His facial expressions are vast and he always shows his genuine feelings, whether they're shock or fury or fear. (good compilation of Garou's many expressions compiled by someone more talented than me: https://the-nysh.tumblr.com/post/185831833031/garous-so-cute-and-more-like-his-age-when-his)

But he does give in and provide a name. And, honestly, his answer made everything clear to me. Like how Saitama knew Garou wasn't "Absolute Evil" despite all his bluster, I knew Garou wasn't Straight™ with this one answer.

Garou names a character. Not a real person, but a character from a show he, most likely, watched as a kid. This is like back in school when any gay kid in the closet would go "I'm not gay, I totally love Britney Spears", or maybe "No, yeah, I totally love boys, I've got a Jack Sparrow poster up in my room". You know the drill. Celebrities are a safe "crush" because they are unattainable, and you will never have to actually act on such a declaration. Fictional characters, by virtue of being -you know- NOT REAL offer even more separation. (And the reason I bring up the fictional character angle, is because Garou remembers her character from the show before her name, suggesting that he has more of an attachment to the character than the actress).

So now he's done it. He's declared a crush. He's answered the question. He's safe. Now what?

Subject Change.

The very first chance he gets, Garou shifts the topic immediately to something else. And look at that. The cockiness is back. The sweat is gone. I daresay, he looks ecstatic to be talking about literally anything other than a girl he supposedly likes.

Just look at his smile (ಥ ◡ ಥ)

And if that weren't enough. We are told exactly why Garou picked this character, this actress, of all the others at his disposal.

Okay. So, first off, that's sad. Like, major oofs here for Garou and his Mommy issues. Secondly, you mean to tell me that Garou likes this woman because she seems kind? Really? That's the main reason? Because, not to get too shippy on what is supposed to be a semi-serious sexuality analysis.........BUT, do you know who else is really kind? Someone who gives off major "familial" vibes? (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)

Hmmmm, I wonder if there's someone Garou's met who he's seen to be very kind and protective over his ward.

Some who, thematically, represents the strong familial love Garou has never had and, apparently, craves. Someone who is closer to his age and he might be able to relate to. Someone who, canonically, he operates on a similar wavelength with?

I dunno, just a thought ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyways, thanks for playing "no-homo" Murata, but I'm afraid I'm still sitting tight on this Batarou train. Maybe next time ;)

[agendratum]

ok so it’s been 3 thousand years and i had the tabs with the tag games opened this entire time so it’s finally time to actually reply to them, and i’ll put them all in one post cause i think my brain won’t let me tag that many people rn

10 characters, 10 fandoms, 10 tags 

tagged by @kissporsche thank you!! now forgive me i will be desperately trying to remember any type of media that i know and characters in it that i might like (my mind - empty)

1. kinnporsche - pete (yes i will also start with an obvious one, idk if anyone noticed that i love pete but now you know that i love pete)

2. word of honor - gu xiang (sorry wkx for being second in my heart, but i think he would understand)

3. the untamed - nie huaisang (apparently currently in the moment, but fav cql character is always a tough question)

4. the devil judge - jung sunah (i support bisexual rights and i support bisexual wrongs)

5. tgcf - shi qingxuan (ignoring all the spoilers, they can’t hurt me if i don’t see them)

6. legend of fei - a-fei

7. the locked tomb - dulcinea/cytherea (listen-)

8. advance bravely - li zhenzhen (i had to)

9. love in the air - sky (he is my son and i haven’t even watched it ksljadsa)

10. svsss - shang qinghua (based on the first book and memes)

i did it, i remembered fandoms, now moving on to

tropes tag game 

tagged by @braceletofteeth thank you!!

found family or soulmates || slow burn or established but complicated || enemies-to-friends-to-lovers or best friends-to-lovers || love at first sight or get back together || morally grey character or unreliable narrator || sunshine character or sarcastic character || self-sacrificing or teamwork || fire-forged friends or childhood friends || description-heavy or dialogue-heavy || fluff or angst || high school au or college (professors) au || flower symbolism or color symbolism || hero from the start or reveal the hero near the end || body swap or gender swap || bed sharing or clothes sharing || magic au or human au || de-aged or future fic

🍂🍁 AUTUMN EDITION 🍁🍂 

tagged by @misspoetree thank you! so smart of me to be doing this in almost the end of november oof

tea or hot chocolate, cozy books or halloween movies, plaid or corduroy (had to look this word up wow), foggy mornings or twinkly nights, orange or black, pumpkin or apple pie, wool or velvet, picking fruit or carving pumpkins, libraries or coffee shops, cinnamon or peanut butter, spooky or cozy halloween, candles or fairy lights

put your playlist on shuffle 

rules: you can usually tell a lot about a person by the type of music they listen to. put your playlist on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, and then tag 10 people. no skipping! 

also tagged by @kissporsche thank you again!! the only issue is i’m currently using like three different services to listen to music so to keep it fair (to myself) i’m gonna take turns shuffling my likes/playlists on all three of them for this one ooof

1. fifteen minutes - mike krol (i know this is from steven universe klasjd)

2. dark (x-file) - (G)I-DLE

3. sorry, i love you - stray kids

4. clear ft. mothica (shawn wasabi remix) - pusher (i don’t even know if the title is correct for this one)

5. give me your tmi - stray kids

6. mirror mirror - milli, f.hero, changbin of stray kids (i knew this one before and still didn’t realise that this is what us danced to on the tour, can you believe it)

7. twisted - MISSIO

8. taste - stray kids (did it actually shuffle the songs tho?)

9. scream - dreamcatcher

10. love stuck - mother mother

okaaay, do i’m gonna tag some peeps here, but obviously only do it if you want, and only the one/s you want to do, no pressure, you know the drill: @vegasandhishedgehog @greenwitching @braceletofteeth @trueplainhearts @t4tvegaspete @sugarbabywenkexing @yilinglaozuhot @the-rat-king-shriggy @guzhu-furen @petesvegas